The Implications of Questioning

My family and I started going to a church a few years ago that would describe its theology as "Reformed" and "Calvinist". For most of my years as a Christian I have wrestled with some of the concepts of Calvinism, even before I knew they were called "Calvinism". I knew about them from my reading of the Bible. I wrestle with them for a couple of reasons. One, I wrestle with them because I am very concerned that God is rightly represented in the things we say about Him. It's about His name and what it means in the minds of people.  Two, I wrestle because I have an inherent sense of justice, rightness, and goodness that either must be reconciled with what I read in God's Word, or altered. I think this sense is in me by virtue of my being created in the image of God and also from the fact that God Himself has resided within me from the day of my new birth (conversion). God also tells me to "examine everything carefully; hold fast to that which is good" (1 Thessalonians 5:21). If I didn't have the mind of Christ within and the Word of God without, I would not be able to examine anything carefully because my examining skills would be deficient. But He has given me His mind and His Word and can, therefore, command me to examine. The need for examination implies that there are matters that I will have questions about. If not, there would be no need for examination. I would already have the answers and know what is good and what is not.

A few years back, a couple from the church invited my wife and me to their house for dinner. In the course of the discussion, as often happens with me, the subject turned to Calvinism. Before I continue, I should explain the basic tenets of Calvinism. Anyone reading this who is already familiar with these tenets should just skip this part. I gleaned these from a website (http://www.thecaveonline.com/APEH/calvinTULIP.html).

There are five points of Calvinism, all described by the acronym, "TULIP".

"T" stands for Total Depravity and asserts that the total human being--body, soul, intellect, and will, is fallen and that everyone is born spiritually dead and spiritually helpless. This doesn't mean people are as bad as they can be. It means that sin is in every part of one's being, including the mind and will, so that a man cannot save himself. (John. 1:13; 8:43, 47; 10:26; 12:37-40; 18:37; Romans. 7:18; 8:5-8; 1 Corinthians. 2:9-14)

"U" stands for Unconditional Election. God chooses to save people unconditionally; that is, they are not chosen on the basis of their own merit. Since one is born totally depraved and enslaved to sin, one's election, which would include their turning to God for salvation, cannot be dependent or contingent on any spiritually worthy action one commits. According to this point, God predestines or chooses to soften the hard, sin-enslaved hearts of certain fallen individuals and liberate them from their death not because of any merit they have but despite their demerits. In other words, He elects to change their hearts (and thereby join them to Christ and His saving work) despite the fact that they hate God and oppose Him, and have hard hearts, not soft hearts, and have sin-enslaved wills, not free wills. Thus, believers have no reason to boast about themselves or their own actions: the only thing that differentiates them from Judas, Esau, or others who never respond in faith is that God gave them grace that He withheld from such reprobates ( Ezek. 11:19-20; 36:26-27; Rom. 9:11-18; 1 Cor. 4:7; Eph. 2:8-10; cf. Jn. 1:13; 15:16; Acts 13:48; 16:14; 18:27; Phil. 2:13).

"L" stands for Limited Atonement.  The sacrifice of Christ on the cross was for the purpose of saving the elect only. This point says that while Christ's blood, life, death, and resurrection--is infinitely intensive in saving power and thus unlimited in one sense, it is not infinitely extensive and is thus limited, and not universal, in the extent of its application; for while everyone conditionally or "provisionally" shares in Christ's life, death, and resurrection (thus, if everyone believed, everyone would be joined or married to Christ), only members of Christ's body or bride or flock (elect believers) actually share in His blood ( Jn. 10:11, 15, 26; 17:9; cf. 6:37, 39; 17:2, 6, 24).

"I" stands for Irresistible Grace. It teaches that God's inward call (as distinguished from the outward call such as where the Word says "many are called but few are chosen") is perfectly effectual and sufficient. When God has chosen to save someone, He will. A hard, fleshly, sinful heart need not add anything to God's grace, such as "co-operation," for this special call or grace is invincible, overpowering all hatred and melting all opposition.  (e.g., Jn. 3:6-8, Acts 7:51; 13:39; Rom. 8:3).

"P" stands for Perseverance of the Saints. Those people God chooses cannot lose their salvation; they will continue to believe. If they fall away, it will be only for a time. This is not the idea that no matter what a believer does he or she cannot lose his or her salvation but the idea that "He who began a good work in you will perfect it . . " (Phil. 1:6) i.e., the idea that whenever God creates faith in our hearts and thereby joins us to Christ and His saving work, He will sustain that faith, that saving relationship with Christ, causing us, by His grace, to persevere in faith. (Jn. 6:37, 39; 10:28-29; Rom. 8:31-39)

Well, back to our dinner engagement. As we discussed Calvinism, I expressed that I had reservations about some of the points. Our host informed me that there were times in church history when people were excommunicated for questioning this particular doctrine. To this day, I'm not absolutely sure what his point was. Was he saying that I should, therefore, put my doubts aside and embrace the doctrine? If that was his point, I would have a serious problem with complying. After all, how do you put doubt aside? Was he saying that I should just ignore my doubts and keep quiet about them? I could do that, but I believe it would be dishonoring to God...not the "keeping quiet" part, but the "ignoring" part, since God is the One who told me to "examine everything carefully; hold fast to that which is good". ((By the way, I am pretty sure my friend was not trying to threaten me or even make me think I could be excommunicated for questioning. I think he was probably making the point that this is a serious doctrine that church leaders took seriously enough to part ways over it......I think)

My initial reaction was, "so be it". If having questions would result in excommunication, then excommunication may not be such a bad thing. By the way, with regard to Calvinism, I had, and have, no reservations about the Word of God. I fully believe that the Word teaches us God's truth...not all of God's truth, but enough for the time being. In the revelation that is called the Word of God, I and many others have found a well with a bottom that cannot be reached. There is only One who can fully plumb its depths. That is the One from whose mind it comes, namely God. In His Word, He even tells us " My thoughts are not your thoughts, nor are your ways My ways, for as the heavens are higher than the earth, so are My ways higher than your ways and My thoughts than your thoughts." (Isaiah 55: 8,9) How much higher are the heavens than the earth? Infinitely higher. Does it not follow, then, that we should expect to find mystery in the Word?
Given God's infinite nature, shouldn't we who are finite expect to find truths that appear to contradict each other, that leave us puzzled and perplexed?

I expect it, and have found it to be the case. Sometimes it makes me feel dumb, like, "What's wrong with me? Why are these things so clear and easy to understand for other people while I find them impossible to wrap my mind around?" It certainly may be a simple matter of lack of intelligence on my part, and I don't say that facetiously...I mean it. It may even be that I am just a stubborn nonconformist and it's rebellion that keeps me in this constant state of uncertainty.
 
Any believer who has attempted to plumb the depths of God's Word can tell you that it is an impossible task to complete. As we meditate on His Word, guided by His Spirit, the Word unfolds, like a flower. Just as we think, "ah, I think I'm finally getting it." Just as we are starting to think that we can box this particular verse up and put it on a shelf, the Lord starts to peel back another petal. We think, "how many petals does this flower have?" It should cause one to pause before filing that box away. I have found this to be the case with the "simplest" of verses.

For example, just this morning, I was reading John, chapter 3. There it says, "For God so loved the world that He gave His only begotten Son..." Wait, stop, what does He mean "only begotten Son"? I started pondering the fact that the Eternal Creator, the One who is behind it all, this mysterious and wonderful Being, for whom all adjectives are gross understatements, has a Son! An only begotten Son. And He gave this Son because of His love for the world.  I cannot wrap my mind around this! Who could make something like this up? I want to peer into it, to "get it", to fully grasp it. Usually sons have a beginning. Usually fathers are older, wiser, and stronger than sons. But not in this case. This only begotten Son is called the Eternal Father, Mighty God, Prince of Peace in Isaiah 9:6. And yet, this Son serves His Father, prays to His Father, calls His Father His God! This exercise could go on forever, I think. But if I am so unable to grasp a "simple little truth" out of one little verse in the Bible, how am I ever going to become settled on a doctrine that is derived from a bunch of verses from different places and contexts in the Bible? Especially a doctrine that has lots of people wrestling with it and coming to different conclusions. In my mind, this is clearly not a time for dogmatism, threat of excommunication or not.

So, I'm going to leave it at this; that God commands us to examine all things, that this command implies uncertainty, that He allows us to discover "good" in our examination so it isn't just an endless pursuit of the infinite. There are settled truths (not necessarily fully grasped) that God wants settled in our minds. There will be things that we examine that we will not be able to be completely settled about and in the midst of this examination we should keep looking to and leaning on Him for insight, and not think that we can handle it on our own.